A billionaire told a friend of mine that he wasn’t ambitious enough.
I see myself in this friend - father, husband, from the South, techy, and good with data. Hearing that story made me feel like I was told that I wasn’t ambitious enough. And I’m not, at least according to that person’s definition.
But they have a different definition of ambition than I do. Their definition has no space for children.
My ambition includes children. And kids change everything.
Everything I could want and do in life all ties back to being a good and ambitious dad.
My health? It’s so I can play with my kids and live a long life to spend as much time with them as possible. Working out and eating well isn’t something that I do only for selfish reasons. I do it because other people rely on me and being healthy is a gift I give to my self and to others.
My career? It’s so I can provide for my family and show my children they can enjoy their work while doing hard things. They can see how I’ve been able to turn my curiosities into a way to earn a living and provide value to others.
My marriage? I fell in love with my wife before I was a Dad and we have a relationship outside of our kids. But having children within the marriage creates a new energy around showing our kids what a strong and happy couple looks like. I want them to see how a husband and wife love and respect each other1.
I am not perfect at all of this. I struggles and fail because I am human. And while I want them to look up to me, I also want them to understand that it’s ok to make mistakes. It’s ok to fail one day and try again the next.
Dad Ambition is my catch phrase for tying all of this together. It looks different than the ambition you see online. It’s not measured in numbers and you win no awards for it.
But it is a worthy ambition of its own kind. It’s the only kind I’ve found that’s durable for an entire life.
Our wedding bands have the phrase “a measure of love and respect” engraved on them. This is taken from the lyrics to “The Garden” by Rush off their Clockwork Angels album.